Breaking up is hard to do. To gear up for the fateful day, the “dumper”
usually plays the scenario over and over in his or her mind until the perfect break
up line is found; a line that has the right balance of honesty and diplomacy. The
dumper’s vision usually ends smoothly, without complications, and a firm "we’ll
part as friends" handshake. Unfortunately, breakups are rarely a mutual decision.
The “dumpee” almost always throws a curve ball in the dumper’s perfect
plan, he or she asks -- sometimes begs -- for a second chance.
Uncomfortable breakups are not restricted to one’s personal life; they can
also creep into one’s professional life when an employer’s response to
a resignation is a counter offer. In a moment of weakness, the employee may feel extreme
pressure to cave in. Should he or she stay in the current job that has become stale
or does he or she move on to take advantage of a more exciting opportunity?
Though the decision whether to stay or go is a personal one, there are common pitfalls
that you must be aware of before accepting an employer’s counter offer. There
are many factors to consider.
The moment you resign, your loyalty to the company is immediately questioned. Although
your manager may say "We’ll give you anything you want" in an effort
to persuade you to stay, be aware that this plea may be a diversion until the company
finds a replacement. Your manager will do what he or she can to protect the interest
of the company. Even if you are not replaced, you may be passed up for a promotion
or not assigned juicy projects because you have gained the reputation of a disloyal
employee, a non-team player.
However, let’s give your manager the benefit of the doubt. After all, he
or she may be sincere in their quest to make things right but they may not have the
authority to follow through. Therefore, don’t take promises at face value; get
your counter offer in writing.
How management perceives you should not be your only concern. Your colleagues may
become resentful that you were given a raise or company perks because, as they see
it, you blackmailed the company into making a counter offer. As far as your colleagues
are concerned, they put in as much time and effort as you to promote the growth of
the company, and they will resent not being recognized for their contribution the
way you have been.
Resentment can develop into a feeling of professional distrust and the dynamics
of your relationships with colleagues may begin to shift. For the most part, the makeup
of your day is defined by your connections with co-workers. When stresses begin to
mount at work, it can trickle into other areas of your life. It is important that
you consider your colleague’s reaction when making the final decision as to
whether you should stay or go.
Resist the temptation to be roped in by and glamour of the benefits you may be
presented. Take into account the core reasons why you decided to begin searching for
another position. Was it because you wanted a prime parking spot? Or was it because
your efforts weren’t valued? Was it because you wanted extended lunches? Or
was it because you want to get home at a reasonable hour? When all is said and done,
are the perks that you are being offered sufficient to overcome your initial objections
that motivated your search for another job to begin with?
Statistics show that employees who decide to accept a counter offer end up getting
fired or quit within the year. Does that mean you shouldn’t accept a counter
offer? Not necessarily. What it does mean is that you should prepare for all the possible
scenarios that may arise. Whether you decide to stay or make a clean break is up to
you. Just be sure that your decision is an educated one.
Certified in all three areas of the job search—Certified Interview Coach ™ (CIC),
Job & Career Transition Coach (JCTC), and Nationally Certified Resume Writer
(NCRW)—Linda Matias is qualified to assist you in your career transition, whether it be a
complete career makeover, interview preparation, or resume assistance. You can
contact Linda directly at
linda@careerstrides.com
or visit her website
www.careerstrides.com for additional career advice and to view resume
samples.
